Content Advisory: The following article discusses sensitive topics related to suicidal thoughts and self-harm. If you’re uncomfortable or triggered by such discussions, please take care and consider refraining from continuing further.
Last week, I found myself unexpectedly on hold for roughly 5 minutes, my mind racing frantically through scenarios to prevent the unthinkable – losing someone dear to suicide. Ironically, despite my training in mental health first aid, I felt less prepared than I had hoped for this critical moment.
Earlier this morning, a close individual messaged me, confessing, “I feel like killing myself.” Instantly, I called them, trying to understand their situation. They were about to start work, yet their words left me unsettled and anxious about their safety.
I tried contacting their family and close contacts but failed to succeed. Not having access to a registered car posed a significant challenge in physically reaching them. (I did not think to use Uber at the time!)
Desperate, I asked for help…
Desperate for guidance, I stumbled upon the number for the Suicide Call Back Service, among various other support options.
When Darryl answered the line at the Suicide Call Back Service (I hope I got the spelling right; my apologies if not), everything changed.
As I explained the situation to D, we focused on two critical questions:
- Did the person contemplating suicide have a specific plan, or was it a fleeting thought?
- How could we reduce the risk of self-harm immediately?
Despite my Mental Health First Aid training, I had overlooked asking these essential questions in the heat of the moment. Through our conversation, D and I determined that the immediate risk was somewhat mitigated as the person was at work with a close colleague. However, driving alone remained a concern. Together, we discussed strategies to minimize that risk.
Throughout this nerve-wracking period, the person who required support remained in contact via text messages. I ensured they understood the gravity of the situation and the steps I took to ensure their safety. Thankfully, I met them in person later and confirmed their well-being. Together, we set up a personal Safety Plan using the Beyond Now app from Beyond Blue, a tool my therapist recommended.
Lessons Learnt from my experience.
Reflecting on this experience, I want to highlight critical takeaways for others:
- Communication and empathy are paramount. Relating to someone through shared mental health experiences helped de-escalate the situation while acknowledging its seriousness.
- Asking the right questions in any form of communication is crucial:
- Is there a specific plan to end their life?
- How can we minimize the risk of self-harm?
- Whether you’ve had suicidal thoughts or are enduring challenging times, having a personal safety plan and sharing it can be invaluable.
- Don’t hesitate to lean on support services like the Employee Assistance Provider, Therapy, or, in this case, the Suicide Call Back Service.
Darryl, or D, was an absolute hero. I made sure to give him the highest rating on the survey post-call. His support was instrumental.
I share this not to simplify a complex topic but to shed light on the importance of preparedness. Not everyone has a safety plan or understands the crucial questions to ask when supporting someone feeling suicidal. Learn from my experience, be ready, and know that support is always available.
Take care,
Trevor (T)
Helpful resources:
Suicide Call Back Service (available 24×7)
BeyondNow Suicide Safety Plan App (iOS) – Not Australian specific!
BeyondNow Suicide Safety Plan App (Google Store) – Not Australian specific!